<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>You Do Something To Me by booshangel</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28071000">You Do Something To Me</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/booshangel/pseuds/booshangel'>booshangel</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Mighty Boosh (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe, Bad Poetry, Bisexual Character, Ducks, First Christmas, Fluff, Gay Character, Howard is socially awkward, Light Angst, M/M, New Year's Kiss, Smut, Vince and Howard understand each other like no one else, Vince is terrible at planning, Vince knows nothing about Jazz, cute dates, just being yourself is always the best, lunch by the pond, these tags are a mess but so am I lol</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 17:33:34</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>11,967</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28071000</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/booshangel/pseuds/booshangel</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>"Vince sighed. This was the third time this week he'd tried to get the attention of bloody Howard Moon and had ended up making an idiot of himself."<br/><br/>"The truth is, Howard liked Vince. He wanted to be someone Vince cared for and depended on; a man of action that Vince would admire. But it seemed like Vince just saw him as someone to laugh at, the same as everybody else did."</p><p>An AU where Vince and Howard work at the same shopping mall and romance inevitably ensues.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Howard Moon/Vince Noir</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Boosh Secret Santa 2020!</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/shinnyluvssuju/gifts">shinnyluvssuju</a>.</li>



    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Smut is only in chapter 5 and doesn't add anything to the plot so you can skip that chapter if it's not for you!</p><p>Title is You Do Something To Me by Ella Fitzgerald - a beautiful song!</p><p>@shinnyluvssuju Merry Christmas! This is my first fic exchange so I really hope you enjoy it &lt;3</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Vince sighed. This was the third time this week he'd tried to get the attention of bloody Howard Moon and had ended up making an idiot of himself. As he cleaned the floor, he went through the same mantra he'd been repeating for the past few weeks, telling himself he didn't need the approval of a man who looked like a homeless geography teacher, but as always it didn't work. He wanted Howard to like him. So far? He hadn't even managed a conversation without embarrassing himself.</p><p> </p><p>Howard had begun working in the record store across from Vince's hair salon a few weeks ago. Vince had watched him quite intensely for the first two, and decided in the last week to try and impress him. From what Vince had seen, he didn't seem to sell many records and was a little full on with the female customers. Many days he had seen Howard getting a lecture from the boss about etiquette and the fact he should be trying to sell <em> all </em> of the records, rather than just the jazz ones. No one seemed to see how hard he tried and Vince couldn't help feeling sorry for Howard. Not only was he deeply misunderstood, but he liked <em> jazz.</em></p><p> </p><p>Vince shuddered at the thought he was crushing on someone with such <em> awful </em> music taste and fashion sense. He was Vince Noir, Rock 'n Roll Star! Why on earth was he pining over someone like Howard?</p><p> </p><p>He started the walk home to his flat, hoping Leroy would be out so he could get to work creating his next plan to get Howard to like him. Thankfully the flat was empty, so he quickly consulted his beloved Plan Pony on what he should do next.</p><p> </p><p>"What do you mean this also didn't work?" The Plan Pony was exasperated at this point. They had made three plans together so far, and Vince had managed to screw all of them up.</p><p> </p><p>"Well, it started out well good! I'd finished doing this girl's hair and she was well cool, her and her mate were in this band called Belladonna and she was telling me this one time a fan-"</p><p> </p><p>"Vince. The plan?"</p><p> </p><p>"Oh right yeah, sorry. So basically I did her hair and then went to go put on my cape, really dazzle Howard an' everything. And then I had this genius idea! One of the shops across from me sells lots of random things so I thought, I know what will make Howard think I'm well cool… roller skates!"</p><p> </p><p>The Plan Pony sighed. At no point in their plan had roller skates been mentioned. He knew Vince was an adult, an adult of a whole twenty four years, and yet it felt like he was talking to an eight year old sometimes.</p><p> </p><p>Vince had seen Howard getting a cup of tea from the coffee place in the centre of the mall every day. He'd quickly worked out that Howard had a schedule he stuck to: he arrived at 9am, ate the same boring ham sandwich at 12pm, and then got himself a cup of tea at 3pm to get him through the last two hours of his shift. The plan had been to get Howard his tea for him and offer to keep him company while he drank it. Vince had made sure to look like his usual sexy vampire self, and had dressed in tight black drainpipes, a see-through black blouse and a sparkly silver cape. However, upon deciding the roller skates were a good idea, the plan had gone downhill.</p><p> </p><p>Vince had forgotten an important fact - he didn't know how to skate. After obtaining the tea and a hot chocolate for himself, he'd put the skates on and started towards the record store. What he lacked in ability, he certainly made up for in enthusiasm, and for the first couple of minutes he just about managed to stay upright. Getting cocky however, he'd decided to go faster, wanting to really impress Howard with his skills. This is where it had gone wrong.</p><p> </p><p>"So I'm skating along yeah, looking well cool and just as I get to the record store, I realise I have no idea how to stop. Luckily, this woman was walking out at the same time and so she stopped me by letting me fall over her! Thing is, she weren't too happy about it. The drinks went all over her chiwow- chiwerw-"</p><p> </p><p>"Chihuahua," the Plan Pony cut in.</p><p> </p><p>"Yeah that. So this woman was all angry at me, but I had a chat with Stacey, the dog, and once we'd poured some cool water over her she was fine. Bought her a ball to say sorry an' she was well happy with that."</p><p> </p><p>"And how does Howard come into this?"</p><p> </p><p>Vince started to turn red, and the Plan Pony wondered how on earth this story could possibly get any worse.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Before Vince could stop himself, he was crashing straight into the woman, landing in a tangle of limbs on the floor. The drinks were flying everywhere, soaking a rather shocked and unhappy Stacey. Grabbing his water from the desk, Howard was instantly running out to cool the poor dog down, who in return appreciatively gave his arm a lick, much to Howard's disgust. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Vince shuddered at the memory, before finally revealing the last and worst part to the Plan Pony who by this point just wanted to go to bed.</p><p> </p><p>Vince had heard the woman yelling at him, but was way more focused on Howard. He'd looked like a proper man of action the way he'd grabbed that bottle and ran. Vince had made a wobbly attempt to stand up, but unable to work out how to do that on wheels, had slipped in the spilt drink and landed back on his bum. He'd smiled at Howard and said "this was for you", before realising how creepy that probably looked. Howard had quickly walked back to the record store looking rather scared, and Vince had cleaned up and headed home.</p><p> </p><p>~~~</p><p> </p><p>The next day, Vince woke feeling much more positive. He had nutella on toast, put on a stylish leather jacket, and he and Leroy danced around to some Jagger for a while. It was the weekend now, which gave Vince two whole days to make sure he was ready. On Monday, he was going to impress the hell out of Howard Moon.</p><p> </p><p>Vince was determined not to mess it up this time. He realised he'd given himself more work to do over the last week after freaking Howard out three times, but he figured with enough charm he could make Howard forget about that.</p><p> </p><p>The Monday before had been Vince's first attempt. Plan one: write Howard some poetry. Vince had seen Howard writing when the store was empty and had overheard him tell customers "jazz was like poetry", so he'd decided to give it a go. Vince thought it would be romantic to leave a poem for Howard to find when he started work that day, and then he could watch his reaction to it. When Howard inevitably loved it, Vince would go and proudly confess it was him that had written it and Howard would be blown away.</p><p> </p><p>The Plan Pony had found a poem and told Vince how to spell all of the words because writing and spelling were not Vince's strong point. Ironically, planning was not Vince's strong point either, but he'd conveniently ignored this.</p><p> </p><p>Vince had got to work early, ready to leave the poem for Howard, when he'd decided he didn't like it. It wasn't really from him, and he didn't even understand some of the words. He had fifteen minutes until Howard would be there, so he'd decided to quickly write his own poem.</p><p> </p><p>He'd watched Howard read it and rapidly begin to blush, which Vince had taken as a good sign. Before he could go over and proudly claim to be the author though, he'd had to finish his first client's hair.</p><p> </p><p>About twenty minutes later, a member of security had come into the hair salon and asked for a private word. Apparently Howard had <em> not </em>liked the poem and had requested security to look back at the CCTV footage to see who had left it. Vince had the poem returned to him and was politely asked not to leave this kind of thing again for a member of their staff.</p><p> </p><p>He'd read it to the Plan Pony that night, baffled as to why Howard hadn't liked it.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Howard your well uncool </em>
</p><p>
  <em> but somthing about u makes me drool </em>
</p><p>
  <em> u seem a bit missunderstood </em>
</p><p>
  <em> but i bet your really good </em>
</p><p>
  <em> id like to take u on a date </em>
</p><p>
  <em> your way to sexy to just be a mate </em>
</p><p>
  <em> id love it if youd show me your trumpet </em>
</p><p>
  <em> i think id enjoy it as much as a crumpet </em>
</p><p> </p><p>"Why are you talking about his trumpet Vince..? And where did crumpets come from?!" The Plan Pony had exclaimed.</p><p> </p><p>"I heard him telling a customer he played the trumpet so I thought it'd be nice for him to show me that," Vince said defensively. "An' I love crumpets! 'Specially with nutella, so I was telling him how much I'd enjoy seeing him play his trumpet by comparing it to me eating a crumpet." He couldn't understand how Howard hadn't been touched by that. He'd been proud of his poem.</p><p> </p><p>As the Plan Pony explained to Vince that he had implied he would be putting Howard's 'trumpet' in his mouth just like he would a crumpet, Vince hadn't known whether to laugh or curl up into a ball of embarrassment. It wasn't like he wouldn't be up for what he'd accidently implied to Howard, but it was probably a bit full on for a first interaction.</p><p> </p><p>On Wednesday, Vince had attempted plan number two: offer a free haircut. Howard was the kind of man that was actually incredibly attractive, but did everything possible to hide that. He wore horrible brown trousers and dodgy hawaiian shirts and made no effort to style his hair. Vince had figured he'd be doing him a favour by offering to do his hair, and had secretly hoped Howard would go shopping with him afterwards so he could suggest some fashionable clothes. Ones that didn't include elbow patches. Whilst out on their shopping adventure, Vince would explain the misunderstanding with the poem and Howard would laugh and smile fondly at him.</p><p> </p><p>It didn't quite turn out like that though. Vince had eagerly ran to the record store as soon as Howard's lunch break had started, forgetting that he was still carrying scissors from his last appointment. As he'd entered the store, smiling wildly at Howard and offering him "a nice, free cut", Howard had screamed and pleaded, "don't kill me! I've got so much to give!" before legging it out the back. Vince had waited to see if Howard would come back, but he'd given up after a while and gone back to work.</p><p> </p><p>When he'd got home that night, he hadn't even needed to ask the Plan Pony where he'd gone wrong. He was aware Howard probably thought he was insane, and he'd started to wonder if maybe he was.</p><p> </p><p>After Friday had rolled around and he'd spilled hot drinks on a dog looking like a maniac in roller skates, Vince knew this was his final shot. For the first time in months, he stayed home Saturday night, choosing to work on his plan rather than hit the clubs. He'd told Leroy he wasn't feeling well, but in reality he'd never felt better. He knew this was the best plan yet! It <em> had </em> to work.</p><p> </p><p>The Plan Pony had refused to help anymore, claiming Vince had become too obsessed and should just leave Howard alone, so he'd come up with this plan all by himself.</p><p> </p><p>As Sunday night came and Vince was brushing his teeth, he smiled to himself in the mirror. He'd worked hard over the weekend and was ready to reap his reward. Tomorrow, Howard Moon would fall for Vince Noir.</p><p> </p><p>He was a genius.</p><p> </p><p>~~~</p><p> </p><p>Fluffing his hair for good luck, Vince strolled into the record store that afternoon and pretended to have a look around. He wanted to go and look at the interesting stuff, Mick Jagger, David Bowie, Gary Numan, but for the plan to work he had to stick to the jazz section. He could feel Howard watching him, and whilst he liked to think it was because he was attractive, he was aware Howard was probably just working out whether he needed to escape.</p><p> </p><p>He'd gone for a simple but striking outfit today, wearing a silver sparkly jumper, black drainpipes and matching silver boots. His eyeliner was perfect, his cheeks bore a few dabs of glitter and his hair was at maximum volume. If he could say so himself, he looked fantastic.</p><p> </p><p>He stopped to properly look at a Miles Davis record, as he knew this was one of the jazz freaks he'd studied.</p><p> </p><p>"Could you tell me some more about this one please?" He looked over to Howard, who cautiously approached Vince before nodding.</p><p> </p><p>"This is a truly remarkable piece of work by Miles Davis. It was released in 1959 and is widely regarded as not only Miles' best jazz record, but one of the greatest albums ever! Kind of Blue is iconic, it's a record everybody should listen to. Worship even. Now let me show you some more of his work. This one, well, prepare yourself to be blown away sir..." </p><p> </p><p>Vince had completely tuned out, not only was jazz <em> so </em> boring, but Howard looked adorable when he was passionate about something and that was rather distracting. He'd really tried to learn his jazz stuff over the weekend, but thinking about it now, he'd not really retained much information because it was just too boring to remember. Still, he needed to try and seem jazz smart at least, and if there was anything Vince Noir was good at, it was winging social situations.</p><p> </p><p>"...so, what do you fancy?"</p><p> </p><p>"You," Vince replied absentmindedly, before realising what had come out of his mouth. "Uh, You… Do Something To Me? That one seemed cool," that was the only name of anything jazz he could remember as it had grossly made him think of Howard.</p><p> </p><p>"That's not by Miles Davis. Were you listening to anything I said?"</p><p> </p><p>"Yeah! But I'm also a huge fan of John Coldtrane you see!"</p><p> </p><p>"<em> Col</em>trane <em> . </em> And You Do Something To Me is by Ella Fitzgerald." Howard thankfully didn't look too annoyed, just very confused.</p><p> </p><p>"Ahhh... I was testing your knowledge!" Vince grinned up at Howard, "you passed!" It was at this point that Vince remembered why he'd failed all his classes at school and dropped out to become a hairdresser - he was useless at studying. Why he'd thought he could learn the entirety of jazz in two days to woo Howard he didn't know, and if he was being honest, he'd spent more time complaining it was boring and eating sweets to get through it.</p><p> </p><p>"So you've just come in here to test me? I'm Howard Moon, jazz maverick! How dare you insult my knowledge, sir?" Howard was clearly irritated now and Vince's confidence crumbled.</p><p> </p><p>At the lack of response from Vince, Howard announced he was going back to writing his poetry, looking slightly alarmed at the accidental mention of the previous week's events.</p><p> </p><p>Vince's heart sank and he quickly left the store and went back to work, getting through his remaining clients as fast as possible before heading to the kiosk round the back of the mall.</p><p> </p><p>"I just don't know what to do. He thinks I'm stupid and that I'm trying to be mean but 'm not." Vince said sadly.</p><p> </p><p>Naboo rolled his eyes, already needing a smoke after listening to Vince ramble on for the last half an hour about all of his unsuccessful attempts to win over some awkward Northerner. The truth is, he already knew about all of it. He'd been watching (and laughing) at Vince's failed endeavors through his blow up crystal ball, knowing at some point Vince would want his help when he inevitably messed things up.</p><p> </p><p>"Look you ball bag, you just need to talk to him. Like an actual human being. And preferably without a weapon."</p><p> </p><p>"Scissors don't really count as a weapon," Vince sulked, "an' it wasn't like I was actually gonna hurt him."</p><p> </p><p>"Vince, I've got clients waiting that actually pay me, so if you don't mind can you take your negative energy somewhere else?"</p><p> </p><p>"Is there nothing you can give me that will help make it better? Please Naboolio?"</p><p> </p><p>"The tea leaves just say 'BE YOURSELF'. That's all the help I can give you I'm afraid."</p><p> </p><p>"That's it? I would've got better advice from bloody ducks. I wanted a magic potion!"</p><p> </p><p>Naboo sighed. "Maybe just be a slightly less chaotic version of yourself, yeah?"</p><p> </p><p>The shaman kicked him out after that, so Vince miserably walked home, giving up hope of ever getting to know Howard Moon.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Howard went home that day feeling exhausted. He couldn't work Vince out. When he'd started at the record store, he'd been captivated by the man in the hair salon across from him. He'd asked his colleagues about him and had discovered that admiring Vince Noir was simply what you did. He was charming, glamorous and it was all too easy to get lost in his big blue eyes. Whilst obviously Howard appreciated Vince's looks, it was something else about him that had caught his eye.</p><p> </p><p>On Howard's third day at the job, he'd wanted a bit of fresh air during his lunch break and had decided to go and sit by the pond for a bit. It was a very dreary day and he hadn't expected anyone else to be outside, but much to his surprise, Vince had been sitting feeding the ducks. Howard had hung back, content to just observe for a bit, and realised that Vince was chatting to them. He couldn't understand how someone so highly talked about and as envied as Vince could possibly be spending his lunch break alone, sitting by a pond on a drizzly day talking to some ducks. Howard had assumed he'd be a bit cocky and full of himself, surrounded by a crowd of friends who hung off his every word, but all Howard saw in that moment was a sweet man that seemed a little lonely.</p><p> </p><p>He'd watched Vince quite a lot after that, always smiling and being the sunshine kid, and had started to wonder if there was a whole different side to Vince that no one got to see. Howard of all people knew what it felt like to be alone, he was twenty nine and had never had a proper relationship or even a very close friendship. He wondered if Vince was in the same boat, just a few years behind Howard.</p><p> </p><p>He'd been trying to work up the courage to talk to Vince one morning when he'd discovered a poem had been left for him; a messy looking 'Howard' written at the top. He'd been very unsure what to make of it, and incredibly confused as to who would tell someone they're uncool in a poem and then go on to insinuate… intimate things. When security had informed him it was Vince and had given the poem back, Howard had felt completely lost. Was he mocking him? Was it a prank? How did Vince even know he existed?</p><p> </p><p>When two days later Vince had entered the store with a pair of scissors offering a "nice, free cut", Howard had thought he was going to die. It was only when he'd made it safely to the staff room that he remembered Vince owned a hair salon and that he'd probably overreacted. But still, who just walks in and offers someone a haircut like that? He was more confused than ever, yet surprisingly still intrigued by the mysterious man.</p><p> </p><p>By the time it had progressed to roller skates, Howard had been absolutely baffled. Vince's manic "this was for you" had circled around his head all weekend and he'd tried desperately to work out what it meant. Did Vince need psychiatric help?</p><p> </p><p>Tonight, he just felt sad. It was clear Vince had been insulting his love of jazz today, and he didn't know why. He obviously wasn't expecting Vince to be into jazz himself, but he felt it was quite unnecessary for him to go out of his way to laugh at someone he didn't even know for something they were passionate about. He hadn't strolled over to the hair salon and mocked Vince when he'd been singing along to The Human League the other day, even though it was <em> awful</em>.</p><p> </p><p>The truth is, Howard liked Vince. He wanted to be someone Vince cared for and depended on; a man of action that Vince would admire. But it seemed like Vince just saw him as someone to laugh at, the same as everybody else did.</p><p> </p><p>His head beginning to hurt, Howard went to bed and desperately hoped tonight's dreams would be Vince Noir free.</p><p> </p><p>~~~</p><p> </p><p>A week later, it was December 1st and the shopping mall was alive with Christmas decorations and music. A Christmas Grotto had been set up in the centre and kids and adults alike were queuing up to meet Santa Claus. Howard had the day off and had come to try and do his Christmas shopping. The list of people to buy for was short, just his neighbour Lester Corncrake and his parents back in Leeds, but he was determined to get them something nice.</p><p> </p><p>He made his way to the centre of the mall, watching happy families with little children getting excited to see Santa. It made his heart hurt knowing he was either going to spend Christmas alone, or go back to Leeds and have to admit to his parents he still hadn't found anyone else to spend it with. A small part of his brain wondered who Vince was spending his Christmas with and what it would be like to celebrate with him. He quickly squashed the thought before his mood managed to drop any lower.</p><p> </p><p>As he got closer to the Grotto, he could see there were about ten elves smiling in the pictures with Santa and talking to the children in the queue. One elf stood out in particular. Whilst the others wore cheap green and red costumes that had no doubt been used the year before, one elf was dressed in a gorgeous golden dress. It was tightly fitted at the top and frilly at the bottom, stopping halfway down the elf's thighs. Matched with red fishnet tights, golden boots and a santa hat, Vince was just <em> breathtaking</em>.</p><p> </p><p>Howard suddenly realised he was standing mere metres away from Vince and silently cursed his legs for taking him somewhere without his permission. He wasn't the only one that seemed to want to be close to him though. The kids swarmed around him, all wanting a picture with the fairytale looking elf, and Vince smiled joyously as he hugged them and posed for photos. Howard was mesmerised by him.</p><p> </p><p>A cry snapped him out of his thoughts as a little girl fell over on her way to Vince. She could only have been three or four, with a little Santa's dress on and reindeer antlers. Vince scooped her up and immediately began to comfort her, jingling the bells on her headband and making her giggle. Despite himself, Howard felt a small smile creep onto his face.</p><p> </p><p>A few moments later, he watched Vince try and drink from an empty coffee cup, give it an annoyed shake and then put it in the bin with a disappointed pout on his face. Before Howard had really thought it through, he'd crossed the remaining few metres between them and was offering to buy him another one.</p><p> </p><p>Vince's eyes widened. Howard would have found it comical if he wasn't preoccupied with seriously considering running away.</p><p> </p><p>"Uhh, yeah? I mean, thanks. Yeah, cheers Howard!" Vince beamed and for a horrible moment Howard feared he would pass out from the beauty of it.</p><p> </p><p>"Right, what is it you're after?"</p><p> </p><p>"Hot chocolate please! With all the marshmallows possible! They're the best bit you see."</p><p> </p><p>"Marshmallows with some hot chocolate coming right up sir!" Vince giggled and bit his lower lip, leaving Howard with a strange sense of pride at being the one to make him do that.</p><p> </p><p>He returned with a tea for himself, and an incredibly marshmallowey hot chocolate and packet of gummy bears for Vince that he thought he might enjoy snacking on. He'd watched him eat through bag after bag of sweets between clients so figured this would go down well, and at Vince's delighted gasp he knew he'd made a good choice.</p><p> </p><p>"Thanks so much Howard! Been getting well peckish, it's hard work being an elf."</p><p> </p><p>"The kids do seem to love you."</p><p> </p><p>"Course they do, I'm Queen Elf!" Vince gave a little twirl, looking ever so graceful before the bobble on his santa hat whacked him in the face.</p><p> </p><p>Howard fondly chuckled. "It's an honour to meet you, Your Majesty."</p><p> </p><p>Grinning, Vince held out his hand to shake Howard's and the touch alone made him feel giddy.</p><p> </p><p>Reluctantly, Vince looked round to the ever-growing line of children. "I've gotta get back to elf duties, don't wanna end up on Santa's naughty list! Thanks again for the drink Howard." He looked nervous, Howard noticed; desperately avoiding eye contact and chewing his bottom lip again while he twirled a strand of hair around his finger. He didn't immediately move away, seemingly hopeful that Howard would say something to prolong the interaction, but any words he tried to speak died on his tongue and he mentally kicked himself for letting Vince give a small wave and walk away.</p><p> </p><p>~~~</p><p> </p><p>Over the next few days, Vince began smiling at Howard whenever they crossed paths on their way to and from work. Howard wondered if this was a subtle invitation to ask him out, but he'd been horribly wrong about these things in the past and he didn't particularly want another one of his failed attempts at romance to end up in the newspaper.</p><p> </p><p>There was also the matter of Vince's sexuality. Whilst Howard would happily be friends if that's all Vince wanted, he couldn't deny that a part of him wanted something romantic between them. He wasn't really sure how you found that kind of stuff out though.</p><p> </p><p>By Friday, Howard had grown restless. He figured he may as well go for it as it wasn't like he had anything to lose, so he strolled over to the hair salon that morning like a proper man of action and asked if there were any available appointments with Vince Noir.</p><p> </p><p>Looking at the planner, the girl shook her head. "He's all booked up until Wednesday, would you like me to book you in then? He's got 2:20pm, 3:45pm and -"</p><p> </p><p>"Howard!" Vince called excitedly as he walked into the salon. "You 'ere for a trim?"</p><p> </p><p>"Err yes, it's getting a bit short so, no wait I mean long, sorry, it's getting a bit long so I'd like it short, not too short just shorter, and I thought I'd see if you could, you know, sort it out for me please sir." He cringed at everything that had just left his mouth over the last twenty seconds, praying he'd wake up now and find this was just another of his Vince themed dreams.</p><p> </p><p>Vince smirked, "so just a trim yeah?"</p><p> </p><p>"Yeah," Howard agreed, upset to discover this was not a dream and that he really was this horrendous at social interaction. "I was just about to book an appointment for Tuesday."</p><p> </p><p>"Wednesday," the girl corrected.</p><p> </p><p>"Right, of course, Wednesday!" He wanted to cry.</p><p> </p><p>"Nah don't be silly, I can fit you in today. Won't take long."</p><p> </p><p>"Oh, are you sure?"</p><p> </p><p>"Yeah pop by during your lunch break and I'll sort you out, make you look nice an' handsome." Vince managed to repress the urge to wink at Howard but couldn't quite stop himself from giving him a little look up and down. Howard thought he might explode from how hot he suddenly was; wondered momentarily if his beige blazer was combustible.</p><p> </p><p>"Uh, thanks Vince. Very kind of you sir." He gave an awkward little nod and Vince giggled.</p><p> </p><p>"S'nothing. See ya later Howard." Vince went and called his first client over, an elderly woman with lilac hair who gave Howard a little sympathetic smile.</p><p> </p><p>After a few seconds, Howard remembered he was supposed to be leaving and not standing perfectly still staring at Vince. He quickly left the salon and started his shift, desperately hoping Vince found his awkwardness endearing rather than uncomfortable and predatory.</p><p> </p><p>~~~</p><p> </p><p>Looking in the mirror the night, Howard grinned at his new hair do. Vince had done a marvellous job, and he felt a little more attractive than usual which was a pleasant feeling. Vince had also tried giving him fashion tips, however, there was no way on earth Howard was going to start wearing too-tight drainpipes and sparkly dresses and all that makeup stuff on his face. He had reluctantly agreed to try a few more colours, though he still firmly believed that the variety of browns offered a wide enough choice.</p><p> </p><p>Despite his obvious horror at Howard's fashion, Vince had chatted happily throughout the whole appointment and Howard was thrilled to discover that conversation between them flowed easily. When Vince had mentioned wanting to see what the new burger van was like, Howard had suggested they try it together and much to his delight, Vince had enthusiastically arranged to meet him tomorrow for lunch.</p><p> </p><p>Howard went to bed feeling a lot more positive than usual, deciding that dreaming of Vince maybe wasn't such a bad thing after all.</p><p> </p><p>~~~</p><p> </p><p>Breathing a sigh of relief, Howard left the record store and wandered across to the salon, glad to see Vince's client paying and getting ready to leave.</p><p> </p><p>It had been much busier today than usual. Saturdays before Christmas were the worst time to work in retail Howard had discovered, and for a while he'd been worried about missing his lunch with Vince.</p><p> </p><p>"Hey 'Oward! You ready for burgers?"</p><p> </p><p>"I was born ready, sir!" They laughed and made their way to the van, walking a fraction closer to each other than was strictly necessary, but neither seemed to mind.</p><p> </p><p>"So what did you want to try?" Howard asked as they queued up.</p><p> </p><p>"Huh?"</p><p> </p><p>"What burger tickled your fancy? You said you saw something nice the other day that made you want to try it?"</p><p> </p><p>"Oh right! See that really cool painting over there? It's a giraffe with a burger for a head and a hot dog for a neck! How genius is that?!"</p><p> </p><p>"It's interesting yeah. Definitely interesting… So what food did you want?"</p><p> </p><p>"Oh I don't know. I just liked the painting."</p><p>Vince beamed up at Howard, looking very much like a child at a toy shop, ridiculously pleased with what they've discovered.</p><p> </p><p>After a few more excited rambles about the van's decoration, Howard finally managed to get an answer for what Vince wanted to eat. His little face lit up as Howard said he was paying, and he decided in that moment that he would spoil Vince rotten if that face was the result.</p><p> </p><p>Vince led them to the pond and they ate on the bench in comfortable silence for a while. The ducks had noticed they had food and were staring intently at the two men, silently begging for a taste of anything.</p><p> </p><p>"Here, you can have the last bit of my burger, 'm full anyway. Just make sure to share it around and- HEY ROGER NO I SAID SHARE. Oh for god sake one sec Howard!" Vince scrambled off the bench and grabbed the remainder of the burger from the greediest duck, breaking it into equal pieces and gently handing it out to the rest of the flock.</p><p> </p><p>Howard was starting to question Vince's sanity again. He couldn't quite hear what was being said, but he could see that Vince was having a full on conversation with the ducks, even pausing for responses. And he'd clearly named them if the scream of 'Roger' was anything to go by. Why did Howard always have to pick the crazy ones?</p><p> </p><p>"Sorry 'bout that Howard," Vince said as he sat back down on the bench. "Roger's being a right arse lately, it's doing mine and everyone else's head in."</p><p> </p><p>"...that one there?" Howard asked, pointing to the duck he thought was Roger.</p><p> </p><p>"Nooo that's Betty! Come on Howard, she's clearly a female duck." Vince laughed and rolled his eyes.</p><p> </p><p>"Right and you know this how?"</p><p> </p><p>"Cause she told me." Vince looked at Howard like he was the stupid one.</p><p> </p><p>"She told you? The <em> duck </em> told you?"</p><p> </p><p>Vince sighed, looking a little sad. "No one ever believes me, but I can talk to animals. I really can. So yeah, she told me, but it's okay if you think I'm lying. Everyone does." Howard went to laugh, sure this was just a prank that Vince was playing, but the younger man looked small and timid for the first time and Howard realised he was genuinely telling the truth. He felt any confusion he had about Vince's revelation morphing into anger at those who had doubted his gift and left him looking this little and defeated.</p><p> </p><p>"I believe you, Little Man."</p><p> </p><p>"Yeah?" Vince's eyes sparkled as they met Howard's and a small smile tugged at his lips.</p><p> </p><p>"Yeah, I do."</p><p> </p><p>"Cheers Howard." They smiled at each other for a moment before Vince continued, "I am quite little aren't I? You're all tall and broad like a teddy bear, you'll have to protect me."</p><p> </p><p>"From Roger?" Vince laughed and Howard joined him, both more than content to spend their lunch break giggling at everything the other said.</p><p> </p><p>~~~</p><p> </p><p>The next twenty four hours <em> dragged </em>. They'd agreed to go out for dinner Sunday night as neither of them were working, and Howard had been up since 7am worrying about everything that could and will go wrong.</p><p> </p><p>He'd spent the morning at jazzercise, hoping this would take his mind off the evening. It hadn't. By the time he got home, he felt like he might be sick from the nerves. He'd made himself a lunch that he could barely eat, had tried to distract himself with some jazz fusion and had showered for way longer than necessary before it was finally time to get ready.</p><p> </p><p>He looked through his wardrobe for the hundredth time, still unsure of what shade of brown corduroy trousers to wear or whether it would be better to go in a suit. Vince always looked stunning, coming into work everyday wearing outfits better suited to a catwalk than a hair salon. The pizza place they were going to only required casual clothes, but Howard got the feeling Vince didn't really understand the word casual so he wanted to match his date's dress code. He conveniently ignored the fact that at no point had either of them called tonight a date, instead choosing to be hopeful that it might turn out to be.</p><p> </p><p>Vince's suggestions of 'more colour' echoed in his head, but in the end he decided on a pair of black trousers, a white shirt, his favourite chestnut braces and a light brown corduroy jacket. After spraying a generous amount of cologne, he was ready to leave.</p><p> </p><p>He pulled up outside Vince's flat, taking a deep breath and reminding himself he was a man of action. Unfortunately, a man of action with no real idea of what to do on a date. The past five weeks flashed through his mind, and he wondered whether or not to ask Vince about the... <em> incidents </em>. He hadn't been brave enough at the pond, not wanting to ruin what turned out to be the best lunch break he'd ever had. Vince hadn't even hinted at any of it, almost like Howard had just imagined the whole thing.</p><p> </p><p>If he was being truthful, he still wasn't sure if this was an elaborate plan to embarrass him. Vince could be laughing with all his mates right now at how gullible that Howard Moon is, finding it hilarious that he hoped to have a chance with Vince Noir. He was scared if he brought it up that this fantasy he was living would end. If Vince was only in this to mock him, it would be nice to at least get a good evening out of it so he could pretend for a few hours that someone actually wanted him.</p><p> </p><p>Realising it was now or never, he got out of the car and knocked on Vince's door, praying to any god willing to listen that this wouldn't be the last time.</p><p> </p><p>~~~</p><p> </p><p>Vince opened the door in a dressing gown, leaving Howard's heart sinking at the thought he might've forgotten all about dinner.</p><p> </p><p>"Howard! Wow… " Vince looked him up and down for a second leaving Howard blushing furiously. "Uh, sorry, I'll literally be like ten minutes! Just gotta get dressed but I've picked my clothes already so I won't be long. Do you um, do you wanna come in?"</p><p> </p><p>"Yeah sure." His mind raced, could Vince genuinely like him?</p><p> </p><p>"Okay but you must know, if you come in… you can never leave." Vince whispered the last bit like it was a secret only he and Howard could share, his lips curling into a small smile and blue eyes sparkling.</p><p> </p><p>"That's fine, I haven't got much on anyway." Vince beamed at the response and Howard's heart rate tripled with the intensity of the eye contact.</p><p> </p><p>Vince led them inside and told Howard to make himself at home while he finished getting ready, so he decided to have a little look around. The flat was full of the most colourful art he'd ever seen. The walls were covered with sketches and painted canvases and a variety of brushes and palette knives were scattered wherever you looked. Various fabrics had been strewed across the kitchen table, and it dawned on Howard that Vince must actually make a lot of his own clothes. He'd had no idea how insanely talented Vince was, and it excited him to think about what else there could be to find out about this man.</p><p> </p><p>Closer to twenty minutes later, Vince announced he was ready. As he slowly walked down the stairs, he revealed a black dress that was covered in pink, red and white flowers, with puffy sleeves and loose frills, matched with brown cowboy boots and subtle eyeliner. Mesmerised by how gorgeous he looked, it took a moment for Howard to remember how to function like a normal human being. Thankfully, Vince seemed to take Howard's lack of composure as a compliment rather than finding it creepy.</p><p> </p><p>"That's a lovely dress."</p><p> </p><p>"Thanks! Made it m'self." Vince seemed proud to show off his creation, while Howard was simply honoured to see it.</p><p> </p><p>"A true fashionista! Right, shall we?" Howard asked.</p><p> </p><p>Whilst he locked the door, Howard opened the car door for Vince who smiled gratefully at him, and as they set off towards the restaurant, Howard felt truly alive for the first time in years.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>This is the kind of golden dress I imagined Vince wearing at the grotto: </p><p>I decided to edit Noel into the dress I imagined Vince wearing on their first date because he looks gorgeous haha! </p><p>I'm sorry they're so big, I couldn't work out how to link them!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>As they sat down at the table, Vince kept reminding himself to breathe. He didn't really understand how they'd got here. (Both metaphorically and geographically if he was being honest - directions were not his strong point.) Only a few weeks ago Howard had run away screaming from him and now he was sitting opposite him at a restaurant on what Vince desperately hoped was a date. He didn't know whether he was supposed to mention their first few encounters or not. He wanted to explain himself, make sure Howard knew his intentions had always been good, but in doing that he'd have to admit he liked Howard. Vince didn't want to make himself vulnerable like that when Howard may only be doing this because he was bored.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"...and a flirtini please." He finished his order and they gave the waitress their menus.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A few seconds of silence passed and before Vince could stop himself he was blurting out, "thanks for the other day Howard. You know, believing what I said about the animals. No one's ever taken me that seriously before." He shrugged, not really knowing where he was going with that thought but finding it important that Howard knew he was grateful.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"I see no reason why you'd lie to me. What do people usually say?"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"They normally just laugh, thinking I'm pullin' their leg or whatever. Some get angry, one told me I needed therapy because I was clearly delusional, but most just tend to laugh."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Why did you keep telling people if that was always the reaction?"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"It'll prob'ly sound silly, but I thought that everyone thinking I was crazy meant that one day I'd find someone who not only believed me, but who thought I was brilliant! You know, like if that many people don't believe in you, it means you've got one person who extra believes in you." Vince was flushed red by this point, wondering why on earth he'd just bared his soul to Howard but figuring it was better that he owned it than burst into tears.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"That's not silly at all, Little Man." Vince smiled at the nickname. "My philosophy is rather similar actually."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Really?"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Yes sir. I always try my hardest but I've never succeeded in being that close to anyone in my life, never really had any meaningful relationships to be honest, and I've always hoped that was because I'd find someone to make up for that. Kind of like you said, I've been waiting for my extra close person."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"That must be quite lonely, 'm sorry Howard."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Oh no! Nothing to be sorry for, we're here to have a nice evening! Let's talk about something else," Howard quickly added.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Before he could come up with a new topic of conversation, Vince reached out and squeezed one of his hands.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"It's okay Howard, I get lonely too. Everyone loves me, but nobody actually knows the real me. S'quite tiring sometimes." Vince wasn't sure where this was coming from, but something about Howard just screamed </span>
  <em>
    <span>home</span>
  </em>
  <span> to him. He felt safe in a way no one ever had before, and he figured the only way to know if it was mutual was to show Howard who Vince Noir really was and hope he still liked him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"I saw you by the pond," Howard replied. Vince furrowed his eyebrows and tilted his head in confusion. "On my third day at the store, I saw you sitting by the pond talking to the ducks. I didn't say anything because I didn't want to intrude, but you looked a bit lonely then. I'd heard such lovely things about you so it surprised me to see you on your own."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"S'nice to get a break sometimes ain't it? I love people and I love people loving me, but ducks are a lot less judgemental."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Except for Roger." Howard deadpanned. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Yes! Apart from bloody Roger!" They fell back into giggling like schoolgirls and as their food arrived ten minutes later, they were still holding hands.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>~~~</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"No way! You're joking!"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Sadly, I am being completely serious. I don't know what was wrong with me, I was just so upset that she didn't like me back that before I knew what was happening I was crying in her back garden. I didn't mean any harm to the koi fish of course, but that's not how the papers presented it." Vince was practically howling with laughter at Howard's failings with an ex love interest of his.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"I've heard many stories of romance gone wrong but killing their koi fish with salty tears is by far the best one ever!"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Thank you sir, I will wear that title with honour."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"You're a nutcase, Howard." Vince was shaking his head as he carried on laughing, but there was no malice behind it. They'd just ordered dessert, leaving Vince glad he didn't have to try and eat through this story because he'd have gotten nowhere. By the time he'd finish laughing, his hot chocolate fudge cake would probably have gone cold.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Finally managing to calm down, Vince asked, "d'ya think it would've worked out with you two if you hadn't killed her fish?" He was already starting to giggle again as he finished the sentence so took a sip of his drink to try and steady himself.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Oh god no. She was in no way interested in me, barely even knew who I was until the fish incident. And even if she had liked me, it wouldn't have lasted because obviously-" Howard abruptly cut himself off, clearly realising too late that he was about to reveal something too personal. Vince however didn't really understand boundaries, so he pressed Howard to continue.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Wouldn't have lasted because..?"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Oh, uh, I'm not very good at household chores. She wouldn't have liked that." His small eyes were furiously darting around which only made Vince find him more endearing. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"We both know you're lying 'Oward."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"I am not sir."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"You can tell me, 'm not gonna judge you or anythin'." Howard was silent for a few moments.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Because I'm gay, Vince." Howard looked massively uncomfortable and it took Vince every bit of willpower he had not to lean across the table and kiss the uncertainty off of his pretty face.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Genius! I'm bisexual, nice to meet you!" He held his hand out and smiled encouragingly at Howard, who shook it and slowly began to smile, relief flooding his face.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Can I ask you something Howard?" Vince received a small nod as he nervously bit his lower lip, hiding his face under his fringe and batting his eyelashes up at Howard.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Are we on a date?" </span>
  <em>
    <span>Please say yes, please say yes, please say yes,</span>
  </em>
  <span> he thought to himself.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Well, um, if you would like this to be a date then yes sir, I would be alright with that." His face had begun to match the colour of the pepperoni pizza he'd just eaten, and Vince tried not to laugh at the sight.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"I was hoping for a little more than alright," Vince replied, his eyes focused on Howard and smile warm.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"I would really like that, Vince."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Me too." He picked up his glass and clinked it against Howard's, "here's to our first date!"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The waitress brought their desserts over as they were toasting: Vince's hot chocolate fudge cake and Howard's apple crumble with custard.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Celebrating anything tonight boys?" She asked.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Yes! This is our first date!" Vince said excitedly as Howard blushed for the millionth time that evening.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"How lovely! Enjoy your night," she winked as she walked away and Vince giggled.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They ate their desserts happily, trying a bit of each other's and ordering another round of drinks.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>As the waitress brought their drinks over, she placed a bowl of strawberries and a small jug of cream down on the table which neither of them had ordered.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Seeing as you're celebrating," she said, "it's on the house."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Wow thanks! Look Howard, how genius is this?" Vince decided he loved this woman for making them stay longer and therefore allowing him to spend more time with Howard.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Thank you ma'am, that's very kind of you."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"You're welcome," she smiled over her shoulder as she moved onto the next table.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Ma'am?" Vince asked, smirking at Howard old-fashioned Moon.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"It's polite Vince. I have good manners you see, for example, when you're-"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Howard stopped talking as Vince lifted his plate to his face and began licking the remaining chocolate sauce off of it.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"You were saying?" He asked innocently, as he wiped the chocolate from his mouth with the napkin.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"You're not funny."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"You're right, I'm freaking hilarious!" Vince was pleased when Howard couldn't keep a straight face anymore, laughing even harder when he realised Vince still had chocolate sauce on his nose.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Vince liked making Howard laugh, he wanted to always make Howard laugh.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>~~~</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>As the car pulled up outside Vince's flat, he noticed Howard was looking tense.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"You alright?"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Yeah, I've had a great time Vince. Thank you." There was a uncertainty to his voice and it worried Vince.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Did you want to talk about our, err, first encounters?" He figured this was probably what was playing on Howard's mind, and now he knew Howard liked him back, explaining it all to him felt a lot less daunting.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Yeah? Yeah. I'm just a little confused, that's all. Don't want to start off on the wrong foot."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Why don't you come in? I'll make you tea and we can talk."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Leroy was in his room thankfully, so Howard sat down on the sofa while Vince made tea before coming and joining him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Basically, when you started at the record store, I wanted to get to know you so I decided to make these plans to like, I don't know, impress you an' make you like me. I'm just not very good at things when I try too hard." As Vince explained his intentions and why each plan had gone wrong, he realised that Naboo had been right. Howard liked him when he was just himself, no plan or fakeness, just authentic Vince Noir. He should have known better than to doubt the tea leaves.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Well, I'm touched you went to that much effort, Vince, I really am. Did you even know the song you said you liked?"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"You Do Something To Me? Yeah I did listen to a few, that was the only one I liked. It made me think of you," Vince shyly admitted.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Howard smiled, "Ella Fitzgerald had a wonderful voice, I'm pleased you liked it."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>As the last of the tea was drunk, Howard reluctantly put his jacket back on and Vince walked him to the door.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Would you like to do this again?" Howard asked.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Yes!" Vince realised he was probably a bit over eager but Howard seemed to like that. "I'd love to Howard. This is the best date I've ever been on, I'd give you a whole nine point five out of ten."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"What could I possibly do to make it a ten, Little Man?" He asked as he brushed Vince's hair behind his ear and leaned in closer.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Kiss me," Vince breathed.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Howard locked eyes with him, slowly looking down to his lips and then back up again as his hand cupped Vince's face, making the smaller man shudder in anticipation.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>As he finally felt Howard's lips on his, Vince was left absolutely speechless for the first time in his life. It was everything he'd wanted it to be and more. Wrapping his arms around Howard's neck, he pressed their bodies together and shivered as Howard's hands lightly rubbed his back before pulling him close at the waist.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Vince desperately tried to commit every single sensation Howard was giving him to memory: the way his moustache tickled at his upper lip, the way the strong musky smell of his cologne filled his lungs, the way his tongue delicately ran across his bottom lip and the soft moan he allowed Vince to hungrily swallow, but he was so lost in pure bliss that he could barely remember to breathe.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It was new, clumsy at times, their teeth clashed and Vince accidently trod on Howard's foot, but they collided so perfectly that it was overwhelming. It was everything a first kiss should be.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Finally breaking away, Howard pressed his lips lightly to Vince's forehead and smiled. "I was too afraid to tell you earlier, but you… you look beautiful tonight Vince."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Vince's eyes twinkled at the compliment and he happily giggled, so full of emotion he didn't really know what to do with it.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"You look well handsome too Howard. I can't wait to do this again."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Me neither, Little Man."</span>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <span>With a final peck on the lips and dinner planned for Wednesday, Howard was heading home.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Vince ran upstairs and updated the Plan Pony who was overjoyed for him, and he was already buzzing about going to tell Naboo tomorrow.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He flopped onto his bed grinning like an idiot, still feeling the faint press of Howard's lips against his own.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Howard couldn't believe his luck. Vince Noir liked him. Vince Noir had tried to impress him. Vince Noir had </span>
  <em>
    <span>kissed</span>
  </em>
  <span> him. The world had never been better.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>On the short drive home, he began contemplating all the romantic ways he could shower Vince with affection. He may be a man of action, but he'd be lying if he said he didn't love a bit of romance, and Vince really did deserve everything in Howard's opinion.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Their dinner date that Wednesday went marvellously well, and over the next two weeks, Howard managed to spend as much time with Vince as humanly possible. He would pick Vince up on the way to work (the bonus being Vince no longer had to pay for bus fares), they would meet for lunch and then Howard would either drive Vince home or they would spend the evening together, more commonly choosing the latter. They'd grown incredibly close in such a short amount of time, but it felt like they'd known each other forever. Howard had never been this happy before, and for the first time in his life, he felt good about himself.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They complimented each other really well. Howard helped Vince care less about his social status and showed him that a movie night and popcorn could be better than even the wildest club. Vince helped Howard make new friends, and showed him that social gatherings could be a lot of fun, especially at this time of year. To be honest, this was the most Christmassy Howard had felt in a long time. As Vince climbed into the car each morning with a different coloured piece of tinsel wrapped around his waist or tied into his hair, Howard couldn't help but get into the spirit of things.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The only thing bothering Howard was Christmas Day. He'd arranged as usual to go to his parents, but he desperately wanted Vince to come with him. He'd learned that Vince's parents had passed away when he was young, so he usually spent the day with Leroy and his family. Vince seemed happy with this, and Howard got along well with Leroy so he didn't want to make things awkward by asking Vince to spend Christmas with him instead. He knew he wouldn't be truly happy though unless Vince was there, and he wanted to proudly introduce him as his partner to his parents.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Howard was leaving for Leeds early Christmas Eve and returning late Boxing Day, but it was already the 21st and he still hadn't plucked up the courage to ask Vince.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>As he got into bed that night, he promised himself he'd be brave enough tomorrow.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>~~~</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Vince wrapped his arms around Howard from behind, snuggling into his burgundy jumper and making small happy noises.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Well hello there," Howard said as he turned around, "have you come to disturb me once again sir?"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Always," Vince cheekily replied, lifting up on his tiptoes to give Howard a chaste kiss, "plus it's time for lunch."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Don't kiss me while I'm at work, it's unprofessional Vince." Howard had said this everyday to Vince ever since their first date, and not once had he listened. Howard could never pretend to be annoyed for too long before he grabbed Vince's hand, dragged him out the back alley and kissed him senseless. One day he was going to get fired. He really didn't care.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Today though, he had something more important to tend to.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Why don't we head to the pond? I've packed us some lunch to eat, thought it might be nice."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Sounds genius Howard."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They made their way out to their favourite little spot, sitting on the bench and tucking into some pasta Howard had made the night before.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Once they'd both finished their food, Howard finally spoke. "Vince, can I ask you something? And you can say no, I promise I won't be offended or anything."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Vince nodded, looking a little worried.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"As you know, I'm spending Christmas in Leeds with my parents," he took a deep breath, he could do this, "and I was wondering if you would, um, if you would like to come with me?" He mumbled the last few words a bit, but from the widening of Vince's eyes, his question had been understood.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Really?"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Yes, only if you would like to."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"YEAH! As if I'd say no 'Oward! I've been hoping you'd ask! I'd love to!" He was practically bouncing with excitement and Howard couldn't help but ask one more question to make this moment even better. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"How would you feel if I introduced you as my boyfriend?" Whilst they had definitely been dating, they hadn't actually become official at any point, and Howard wanted them to arrive as a proper couple.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He was hoping Vince would be happy and say yes, what he was not expecting was for Vince to burst into tears.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Hey Vince! I'm sorry, is it too fast? Are you okay?" Howard panicked.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Oh Howard you're so stupid sometimes," Vince half sniffled half laughed, "I'm just happy. I really want to be your boyfriend."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Yeah?" Howard's face relaxed back into a smile and he pulled Vince onto his lap and kissed his temple. "I'm happy too, Little Man. So happy."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Vince pulled back to smile at him, the tears in his eyes making them glisten like the sun makes the sea sparkle.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"My parents are going to love you."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"I can't wait. I'll be on my best behaviour an' everything!" Howard chuckled and raised his eyebrows as if to sarcastically say, </span>
  <em>
    <span>'of course you will be'.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Before Vince could even think about protesting, Howard leaned in to kiss him properly, letting his tongue slowly explore his boyfriend's mouth. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Boyfriend, </span>
  </em>
  <span>his mind repeated ecstatically.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>~~~</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>As Christmas morning finally arrived, Howard was woken by Vince peppering kisses all over his face.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Merry Christmas Howard!"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Merry Christmas to you too, Little Man."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They lazily kissed for a bit, and Howard briefly thought to himself that Vince in his arms was the greatest gift he'd ever received.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They got into their matching Christmas jumpers that Vince had insisted they wear and headed downstairs to see Howard's parents, James and Diana.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>As Howard had expected, they'd adored Vince the moment they met him and Christmas Eve had been full of laughter, board games and chocolate.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Morning boys, oh you look splendid!"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Cheers Mum! Howard looks well handsome in his." Howard's parents had insisted Vince call them Mum and Dad now that he was part of the family, and Howard had been genuinely concerned that Vince would melt into a puddle of happiness. He'd called them Mum and Dad at every opportunity he'd had so far, and it filled Howard with immense joy every time. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Can you guess who's idea this was?" Howard said sarcastically, secretly loving his jumper but not ready to admit that yet.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Definitely Vince's. There's no way you'd pick something so stylish," his dad joked and Vince cackled, clearly enjoying all the positive attention he was getting.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Howard just rolled his eyes but they all saw the small smile he couldn't quite hide.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Their Christmas Dinner had been spectacular, and seeing as it had been mainly cooked by Diana, she got to choose what film they watched and so Howard currently found himself cuddled up on the sofa with Vince watching 'Love Actually'.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He could tell Vince was getting tired, and his suspicions were confirmed when Vince whispered into his ear, "need a sleepy Howard." Pulling the blanket up further, Vince curled into Howard's side and shut his eyes. Out of the corner of his eye, Howard could see his parents quietly gushing over how cute they must look, and whilst he didn't really like being looked at, he felt pride knowing that he was being seen looking after his lovely Vince.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>~~~</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>After Vince had woken from his nap, it was time to exchange presents. Howard received some jazz records from his parents which he greatly appreciated, and much to Vince's delight, they'd bought him some new paints at Howard's suggestion. He beamed at Howard, looking elated at finally being part of a family. Howard had bought his dad a new golf club and his mum a silk purple scarf, and Vince had given them a box of chocolates and a bottle of wine. Diana and James kindly wandered into the kitchen to give the boys some privacy as they opened their gifts from each other.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>As Vince tore into the wrapping paper, Howard's nerves bubbled up inside him and made him feel slightly nauseous. He really wanted Vince to like his present. They'd agreed to only get each other something small, deciding to save up to go on holiday at some point instead. Howard knew it was quick, but it just felt so right. He didn't want to screw it up now by getting Vince a bad gift.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Oh Howard! He's so cute and wow… sooo soft. I love him and this is genius!" Vince pointed to the white jumper his teddy bear was wearing. It had a picture of Vince and Howard printed on it from their date to the zoo, one of Howard's favorite pictures of them smiling with an arm around each other.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"This is my second favourite teddy bear ever. You're obviously still my first favourite Howard, but Moonie here is second."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Moonie?" Howard smiled.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Moonie," Vince giggled and nodded. "Thank you. I love him." Vince looked genuinely thrilled with his teddy bear and it made Howard's heart burst. "Now open yours!"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Howard was handed a large rectangle present which he began opening with care. He quickly realised what it was and he gasped.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Vince had painted the two of them together, sitting by the pond surrounded by ducks. They were holding hands and smiling at each other, Vince leaning into Howard on what had become their bench.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Vince… I don't even know what to say. This is beautiful. I… wow, I'm so touched." Howard worried he might actually start crying at how thoughtful this was.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"You like it yeah?"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"I love it! This is going straight up on my bedroom wall and never coming down! Thank you."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They kissed and cuddled and smiled against each other's lips, foreheads pressed together, until a slightly-louder-than-necessary cough came from James and they broke apart before Howard's parents came back into the living room.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They drowned Vince in compliments for his artwork until his cheeks were flushed crimson and his jaw visibly ached from smiling. With Christmas music on in the background, they continued to play various board games and Vince didn't once let go of Moonie.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>This is just smut! You can skip this chapter if you want and the story will still make perfect sense.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>As the evening came, Diana and James left for their church service, leaving Vince and Howard with the house to themselves. They decided to go straight to bed, exhausted from the day and wanting a nice comfy cuddle.</p><p> </p><p>As Vince draped himself over Howard, he grinned. "I've had the best Christmas ever today! Thank you for inviting me."</p><p> </p><p>"Me too Vince. I'm so pleased you're here." He started running his fingers through Vince's hair, enjoying the little purring noises it pulled out of him.</p><p> </p><p>Vince leaned down and locked their lips together, kissing Howard slow and deep. They hadn't gone any further than this so far as Howard hadn't been sure he was ready, but as time went on and the kissing turned a little more desperate, he knew tonight was finally the night.</p><p> </p><p>"Vince, I..." he managed to get out as Vince trailed kisses down his neck.</p><p> </p><p>"You okay? We can stop if it's too much, yeah?" As always, Vince was full of understanding and concern, making it feel even safer for Howard to make the leap across this physical boundary. </p><p> </p><p>"Yeah, I'm good. Vince, I- I want you. All of you. I'm ready now."</p><p> </p><p>"You sure? You know I'm 'appy with a nice spoon." Howard chuckled fondly, giving Vince a quick kiss.</p><p> </p><p>"I know, but I'm ready. I trust you." Vince smiled and nodded, leaning back down to kiss him again, slowly grinding his hardness into Howard's.</p><p> </p><p>It wasn't long before clothing was being removed, both men eager to be skin to skin, kissing like they were trying to crawl into each other's bodies, desperate to become one.</p><p> </p><p>When all barriers between them were finally gone, Vince unhurriedly began kissing down Howard's body, seeming to savour every taste he got of Howard's skin and wanting to worship the man beneath him. He settled himself between Howard's legs and looked up at him.</p><p> </p><p>"You sure?" He asked again.</p><p> </p><p>"Yes, please Vince. Need you."</p><p> </p><p>Vince grinned at the state he'd already put Howard in, and decided not to tease him as it was his first time. He wanted this to be good for Howard.</p><p> </p><p>He started lazily pumping Howard's cock, causing Howard to gasp in surprise at how great it felt to have Vince touch him.</p><p> </p><p>"Mmm Howard, you're so big," he licked up the underside of his cock, "taste so good for me." He began lapping at the slit where he was leaking steadily, ripping a low moan from Howard's throat.</p><p> </p><p>"Gonna make this so good for you, yeah?" Vince sucked on the head and Howard's hand reached down to grab at Vince's hair. "Pull it as much a ya like," Vince said breathily, still slowly moving his hand up and down Howard's now throbbing cock.</p><p> </p><p>"Vince, I- ohhhh, I don't think I can, ah, last-"</p><p> </p><p>"Sshhhh," Vince cooed as he gradually increased the speed, "don't worry about it. I want you to come for me, want you to come down my throat like a good boy. Can you do that for me Howard?" He licked and sucked at Howard's thighs as he frantically nodded, a desperate <em>"yes"</em> escaping his lips. </p><p> </p><p>"So good for me Howard," Vince praised as he stared deep into Howard's eyes whilst he slowly took as much of his cock into his mouth as he could.</p><p> </p><p>"Ohhhh fuck, Vince, ohhh don't stop, please ah-" Howard cried out as Vince swirled his tongue around and and used his hand to meet his lips halfway. Vince hadn't broken eye contact, making sure Howard watched every bob of his head as he pleasured him.</p><p> </p><p>His hips started bucking up into Vince's mouth, but he made little effort to restrain him, enjoying having a mouthful of Howard as his head was pushed further down. He hummed happily around his cock and Howard cried out, face and chest flushed, back arching on the sheets and Vince's name on his lips.</p><p> </p><p>Vince couldn't take it anymore. Reaching down between his legs, he took his own begging cock in hand and started roughly jerking himself off as he felt Howard getting close to the edge.</p><p> </p><p>"Vince, gonna- ohhh gonna come, Vince, fuck, Vince!" Howard's entire body spasmed as his orgasm flooded through him, thighs shaking and hands tugging at Vince's locks. He filled Vince's mouth who hungrily drank every last drop of his come down, sucking and slurping until Howard was completely spent.</p><p> </p><p>Vince pulled off with an obscene <em> pop </em>and sat up on his knees, speeding up his own fist at the sight of Howard messy and disheveled below him.</p><p> </p><p>"Fuck, Howard. You've no idea how fucking sexy you are."</p><p> </p><p>"Vince, let me." Howard shakily sat up, joining Vince's hand around his cock and grabbing his arse. "Stunning. You're unreal Vince. Fuck, look at you."</p><p> </p><p>Vince was close now, and the addition of Howard's big hand around his cock made him whine. Howard began kissing and nibbling at his neck, sucking hard when Vince cried out, "mark me!"</p><p> </p><p>"Yes! Howard, make me yours."</p><p> </p><p>"All mine," Howard murmured into Vince's ear, "come for me, Little Man. I want to see how beautiful you are when you come."</p><p> </p><p>With one last twist of his hand, Vince fell apart, shooting streaks of come all over their chests as Howard pulled him in for a passionate kiss, swallowing every moan Vince made.</p><p> </p><p>~~~</p><p> </p><p>After they'd cleaned themselves up, Vince had cuddled back up to Howard, intertwining their fingers and kissing Howard's knuckles.</p><p> </p><p>"Was everything okay?"</p><p> </p><p>"Perfect, Vince. So perfect."</p><p> </p><p>Howard tenderly kissed over the mark he'd left on Vince's neck. "I didn't hurt you did I? He asked worriedly.</p><p> </p><p>"Nah, was genius," Vince smiled. "Gave me exactly what I wanted. You always do."</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Chapter 6</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The new year rolled around quickly, and Vince decided that this year he'd rather stay in with Howard than get pissed at a club somewhere. Howard had been incredibly touched when Vince had told him this, and had promised to make it a new year's eve to remember.</p><p> </p><p>They'd spent the day at Howard's place, attempting to bake a cake, making love a lot and throwing satsumas at each other. Vince couldn't be happier to be starting the new year with Howard.</p><p> </p><p>As the clock hit 11:45pm, Howard poured them both a glass of bucks fizz because they'd both decided champagne was too expensive.</p><p> </p><p>"I want to toast to you Vince. You've made my life better than it's ever been, you make me happy every day and I am a better man because of you sir. I've waited my whole life to find my extra close person, and I'm so grateful I've finally found that in you. Here's to our first new year together, but certainly not our last." They clinked glasses as Vince tried not to cry and took a sip of their drink.</p><p> </p><p>"Can I do one too?"</p><p> </p><p>"Yeah of course."</p><p> </p><p>"I'm really pleased I'm your extra close person Howard cause you're mine too! And you're the person who extra believes in me like I always wanted! You like me when I'm sad just as much as you like me when I'm happy and you make me feel all safe and warm and fuzzy. You're a great teddy bear Howard, and the best thing that's ever happened to me. Here's to a lifetime of new year's eves together." They clinked again, both unable to keep the tears from falling this time.</p><p> </p><p>"Actually Vince, you're wrong."</p><p> </p><p>"What?"</p><p> </p><p>"I don't like you just as much when you're sad as I do when you're happy... <em> I love you </em> just as much when you're sad as I do when you're happy. I'm in love with you, Little Man."</p><p> </p><p>"Oh Howard," Vince was fully crying now. "You scared me, you tit. I love you too. I'm like massively head over heels in love with you."</p><p> </p><p>Howard pulled Vince close and they clung to each other like a promise they would never let go.</p><p> </p><p>Howard kissed Vince's head and walked over to the record player, leaving Vince wondering what song they would end this year and start the next year with.</p><p> </p><p>As soon as it started, Vince knew Howard had made the perfect choice.</p><p> </p><p>"Would you dance with me?" He held out his hand for Vince who enthusiastically took it. They began to slow dance; hands clasped together, chest to chest and eyes looking at nothing but each other.</p><p> </p><p>When the clock struck midnight, their lips met in a loving embrace as they swayed together, saying everything that didn't need to be spoken: <em> this is forever. </em></p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>
  <em>"For you do something to me, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> That nobody else could do, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> That nobody else could do..."</em>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thank you so much for reading, comments are appreciated if you enjoyed it!</p><p>@shinnyluvssuju I hope you liked it :)</p><p>Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year Booshlrs! So much love to you all &lt;3</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
</body>
</html>